Betterment Burnout: Why We Might Need to Question the Need for Self-Improvement

Understanding Betterment Burnout

The relentless pursuit of self-improvement has become a common goal for many, especially among women. From altering our behavior to fit societal norms to constantly seeking ways to enhance our physical appearance, the pressure to become a "better" version of ourselves can be overwhelming. This phenomenon, known as betterment burnout, is characterized by the exhaustion that comes from the never-ending quest for self-improvement.

What is Betterment Burnout?

At the beginning of 2024, a survey conducted by Bumble among 25,000 users revealed that 55% of singles feel pressured to pursue self-improvement, and one in four feels unworthy of a partner. According to Dr. Adrienne Evans, a professor in Gender and Culture at Coventry University, this drive for self-improvement is often a response to feeling a lack of control, especially in times of crisis like the global pandemic or economic hardship. Self-improvement becomes a form of agency and control in an otherwise uncontrollable world.

The Impact of Betterment Burnout

Burnout is traditionally associated with work, but the principles apply to self-improvement as well. Factors such as lack of control, unclear guidance, high demands, and imbalance between expectations and joy contribute to burnout. Unlike work, self-improvement has no clear endpoint, leading to perpetual dissatisfaction and burnout.

Tips to Avoid or Heal from Betterment Burnout

  1. Lead with Curiosity and Compassion: When you notice signs of burnout, pause and ask yourself if the drive for improvement is genuine or externally driven. Evaluate your true intentions and choose activities that genuinely satisfy your needs.

  2. Consider Just Being: Embrace moments of rest and self-acceptance. Question whether certain practices serve you or if they make you question your worth. Rest allows you to reflect and accept yourself as you are.

  3. Turn a Critical Eye to Self-Help: While self-help can be beneficial, it's important to critique its messages. Recognize that the genre often targets women and perpetuates the notion that they must constantly improve to succeed. Focus on what genuinely helps you without being overly critical of yourself.

  4. Prioritize Relationships and Community: Self-improvement can be isolating. Engage with your community and foster relationships, which are crucial for happiness and longevity. Collective engagement can provide joy and fulfillment.

  5. Focus on Evolution Rather than Improvement: Embrace growth and evolution as natural processes rather than constant improvement. This mindset shift can reduce self-criticism and societal pressure.

  6. Practice Gratitude: Regularly remind yourself of the good in your life. Gratitude can enhance mood and well-being, helping you appreciate yourself and the world around you.

Conclusion

By adopting these strategies, you can navigate the pressures of self-improvement, find balance, and embrace joy without falling into the trap of betterment burnout. Recognize that happiness is a skill to be practiced, not a destination to be reached, and prioritize self-care and genuine well-being over relentless self-improvement.